Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
