Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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