Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
It's not a walk of shame if you run
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
