I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
All I want is dick and wine.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
