I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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