Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
