Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
