Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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