Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
