why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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