u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize