Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I can't turn off my feet"
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
