Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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