Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize