this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize