Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
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