...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Let the clothes fall where they may.
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