You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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