Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize