i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
