One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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