I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize