So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
