Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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