No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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