whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
