Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Randomize