He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
