OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
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Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
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Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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