U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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