I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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