Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he tried to convert me to islam
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize