So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
