I think i sorta joined a cult last night
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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