i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
