She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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