Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
