There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
