he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Is Oprah even human
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize