I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
