Texts From Last Night

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  (714): View more from California

  found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.

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  (714): found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner. http://tfl.nu/5d6x
  Replies (42) Good night (926) Bad night (14758)
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  (+91): View more from India

  Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.

  (+91): View more from India

  what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?

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  (+91): Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step. (+91): what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her? http://tfl.nu/u7i2
  Replies (11) Good night (600) Bad night (2141)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!

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  (706): TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!! http://tfl.nu/qyaf
  Replies (3) Good night (3354) Bad night (580)
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  (914): View more from New York

  How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?

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  (914): How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German? http://tfl.nu/tyh7
  Replies (27) Good night (1093) Bad night (5272)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.

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  (541): its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again. http://tfl.nu/0bz7
  Replies (10) Good night (4380) Bad night (1093)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things

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  (601): having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things http://tfl.nu/w4id
  Replies (39) Good night (15470) Bad night (768)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore

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  (781): I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore http://tfl.nu/jp8t
  Replies (19) Good night (861) Bad night (4068)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.

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  (304): it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears. http://tfl.nu/ziqy
  Replies (31) Good night (8412) Bad night (1614)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.

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  (630): Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box. http://tfl.nu/2fsf
  Replies (23) Good night (6789) Bad night (895)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.

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  (303): It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore. http://tfl.nu/nzed
  Replies (16) Good night (734) Bad night (3020)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.

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  (206): someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'. http://tfl.nu/u94d
  Replies (9) Good night (6924) Bad night (804)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?

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  (847): What sexual position says im sorry for your loss? http://tfl.nu/sjhl
  Replies (26) Good night (2308) Bad night (741)
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  (951): View more from California

  Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.

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  (951): Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night. http://tfl.nu/gbx1
  Replies (10) Good night (978) Bad night (467)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.

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  (813): Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line. http://tfl.nu/x7j1
  Replies (4) Good night (690) Bad night (198)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.

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  (314): I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work. http://tfl.nu/eou1
  Replies (1) Good night (391) Bad night (182)

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