He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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