I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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