Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
