Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
