Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
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