Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize