Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
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