I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize