yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
