She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
you would pick up someone in the library
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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