that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I just found a bag of teeth...
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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