hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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